Morning Coffee- I See You!

"So here's what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him." Romans 12:1


In thinking of this scripture, I want to write at least one reflection each morning of Lent.  As a SAHM, I have struggled at times to find value in what I do, so I believe that the Lord will use this time to show me more of himself and how he is working.  As I was reading in Genesis yesterday for my Beth Moore bible study on the Patriarchs, I came across Hagar.  Hagar was Sarah's servant.  Sarah gave Abraham, her husband, Hagar to sleep with to bear a son.  After Hagar became pregnant, Sarah treated her pretty badly.  In Genesis 16, Sarah and Abraham kept referring to Hagar as "the servant."  They didn't even use her real name.  When Hagar ran away, God met her beside a stream in the desert (Really?  Who else can put a stream in the desert but God?).  When God talks to Hagar, he calls her by her name.  After that encounter, Hagar calls God, "El-roi," the God who sees me.


I think we all need that reminder.  I was lying Carson down for a nap that he didn't want to take.  He pushed himself up taking a second break from wailing to look to see if I was there.  He was like, "Look, Mom, don't you see I'm upset here?!"  That's what God showing up in the middle of the desert was to Hagar.  God saw her distress.  God doesn't just sit back and watch us on our own reality TV show.  He SEES us.  He already knew why Hagar was upset and running away.  It is so comforting to know that when I am home, by myself, with a screaming baby and I am so sleep deprived because his teeth are taking forever to come in and I have no hint of rest in the near future- God sees.  Also, even in the great moments He is there.  Carson was rolling around on the floor, and everytime he ended up in a different place, he would look up and I would say, "I see you!"  It wasn't enough that I was in the same room, he wanted to know I knew exactly where he was.

Do you have times like this where you feel like no one understands?

Date Night!

Carson's 13 week birthday celebration didn't include him. Although we love our little man to pieces we needed some time for the two of us. I was excited for an occasion to wear more than sweats and a T-shirt with spit up on it.  AND I finally am fitting back into my clothes! We went to a very nice restaurant called The Vintage Tavern.  It was beautiful and lodge like inside.  So cozy!  Jeff commented almost halfway through the dinner that we were able to talk about other things other than Carson for about 45 minutes.  Oh, how our lives have changed with this little man! It was so nice to just sit and be and not have to feed him while we're trying to eat dinner.  We would love to try to go out just the two of us at least once a month.  A great thing was that I didn't feel guilty at all for leaving him.  One, I knew he was in good hands with Pops!  And secondly, I crave alone time with my husband.  It has been an adjustment for everyone with me staying at home with C-man and Jeff starting a new position and working some longer hours.  I believe we are better parents when we take time to spend on our marriage.  I am so grateful for my husband.  He is an amazing man and a wonderful father.  I can't get enough of both our family time and "mommy and daddy time."

Vintage Tavern in Suffolk

Blooper love

In anticipation of my friend's, Krystal, baby's arrival, I started reflecting on the first few hours when I became a mom.  I was never one of those girls who couldn't wait to be a mommy.  In fact, infants mostly scared me.  I thought they were so fragile and really, what the heck do you do with them?  I was clueless, to say the least, especially since I never took interest in baby things.  I also didn't have much exposure to babies either.  Carson was born late at night during a hurricane, so we weren't expecting visitors until the next day.  Around 1am, the nurses were basically through with their checks and everyone was ready to go to bed- except me.  I couldn't believe that the hospital lets you have a child and then doesn't tell you what to do with them.  How irresponsible!  I knew that I was supposed to feed him every two hours. So, I just stared at him for the next two hours.  Not an awe-struck, new mommy love gaze.  It was more of a I-have-no-idea-what-I'm-doing babysitting gig gaze. (Of course I felt like I was babysitting!  It takes a while for you to believe that a person just emerged from your body!)  I felt much better when I could take care of him when he was inside of me.  OK, I could do this.  My task was to feed him every two hours and listen to make sure he was breathing.  Every two hours I tried feeding him but he just slept, so I figured I had potent colostrum because he ate right after birth.  I also figured he would cry if he was hungry.  Around 7am, my nurse came in and asked how he ate.  I told her that he preferred sleeping.  I was then berated for not waking up my child to eat.  How was I supposed to know that I had to do tricks to wake up my newborn to eat? I felt horrible.  Seriously, why doesn't an instruction manual pop out with the baby?  So, I failed at my first mommy task. My first of many mommy bloopers.  I have heard this before, and so far it seems to be true, that by God's grace, my child will survive my parenting. 

Proof:)

Two Months Old!!

Carson just turned two months old! Already I forget that it's only been 8 weeks since he came into this world! He's sitting up by himself and standing with little assistance for small amounts of time. He's talking so much and we have lots of conversations.  He is so attentive and loves taking in all of the scenery. He recognizes our voices and gives us big smiles when he sees us.  He eats every 2-3 hours and usually has about a 4 hour stretch at night.
We just took him for his two month checkup and shots. I've been dreading this appointment for weeks. Jeff told me he'd get off early so I wouldn't have to be in the room when Carson got his shots. I HATE shots. Jeff held my hand last time I had to get one. So the thought of just hearing my baby screaming because if them made my stomach turn- it was incomprehendable holding my child down to get shots. It didn't look good all day for Jeff to be able to leave early to come but he met me at the doctors office. Thank goodness!! It truly was awful listening to him get 1 oral and 3 shots. Poor baby! I was uneasy having him get all of the vaccines. I did feel a little better because he has so much baby fat! Let me tell you how much: My 8 week old weighed in at 16 lbs 9 oz!!! He is 24 3/4 in long. He looks like he's so much older! I am thankful for his size because I think his shots went better than if he was smaller (well that's what I'm telling myself). He had a fever for the next 24 hours, so we gave him baby tylenol. He was a champ and not very fussy at all. I have such a great 2 month old!